Cola (Red)

God's gift

Lunchables Cola is quite possibly the greatest to have ever existed on planet Earth and quite possibly the entire universe.[citation needed] For those of you filthy plebs[citation needed] who are unaware of this amazing drink, Lunchables Cola was a standard can of cola that was included with a few specific versions of Lunchables.[citation needed] However, what makes Lunchables Cola much better than the rest is its otherworldly powers that just simply cannot be contained with a can of say Coke or Pepsi.[citation needed] Lunchables Cola is known for its incredible healing powers,[citation needed] which have been known to cure cancer,[citation needed] AIDS,[citation needed] and even bring people back from the dead.[citation needed] Yes, it's that powerful. In fact, it's so powerful there have been entire debates over whether or not Lunchables Cola should be sold to the public in fear of people recklessly using it or not using it the way God[citation needed] intended. So, as of 199X, Lunchables Cola has been discontinued[citation needed] and is now only shared around laboratories and research foundations among other more secretive places.[citation needed] It has been estimated that only about 75 cans are left that still have the cola inside of them.[citation needed] So, trying to get your hands on one definitely is not easy.[citation needed] However, there has been a rumor that a warehouse located in Muscatine, Iowa contains more of this fabled and mysterious cola.[citation needed] It's only a rumor. So, nobody knows how true it really is. However, if it turns out to be true, then there will be a war.[citation needed]

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